Board Thread:Character Discussion/@comment-34563899-20180202235154/@comment-31231929-20180206014850

Lady Junky wrote:

Emillian Swanones wrote: Rumple shut her down when she wanted to have a discussion with him about leaving their village and starting over, he humiliated her in front of the people at the tavern when he lectured her on her responsibilities (Milah was absolutely wrong to leave Bae at home, but Rumple could have talked to  her about what she did in private or he could have waited for her to get home and not leave their son outside the tavern), and signed away her reproductive rights when he sold their second born child. Yes, Milah could have had a second child with someone else, but in the society they lived in, that would have most likely been taboo and she would have been ridiculed. When Milah found out what Rumple did, she was very, very upset. And even though you keep saying it's out of context, Rumple killing Milah because she rejected him is definitely a sign of abuse. It doesn't matter that it had been years since she left him, they were still technically married at that point.

Milah did say mean things to him, I'm not denying that, but Rumple crippling himself led to her being mocked for having a cowardly husband aka a toxic situation. She did say he should have died, but she later took it back and said she didn't really wish he died, just that he fought. Milah lived for years in a toxic environment (I'm including how the village treated her, not just what her home life was like)  that was created by her husband, which made her depresssed, so I can understand her being mean to him.

And I don't hate Rumple, I'm definitely not a fan, but I don't hate him. I am trying to be objective and look at the situation from both Milah and Rumple's perspective. Both of them contributed to the toxic environment and neither is blameless, but I firmly believe taking away her right to a second child without having to suffer from possible backlash due to second child being born out of wedlock and killing her is worse than shaming, ridiculing, and mocking because of how she was being treated by others because of his actions during the war. Seriously? Why do you keep repeating the same arguments over and over?
 * First of all, this discussion about leaving has zero value from Milah. As I explained it, it came years too late. It happened in 204, Bae was already 5/8 years old, or whatever. Milah started abusing Rumple right after Bae's birth. For YEARS, she never had a discussion with him about leaving. When this discussion happened? When she was asked by Hook to join the pirates. Meaning, when she got an opportunity to leave Rumple & Bae. She only had this discussion with Rumple once another man was really to take her with him. If the point was really to start over, then Milah should have had this discussion YEARS before that.
 * "He humiliated her"? Thank you for another good example of victim blaming. Here is the exact dialogue of Rumple during that scene: "Please. You have responsibilities." with a weak voice. Wow. So humiliating. He asked her to come back because she has responsabilities with Bae. That's not a humiliation, that's a fact. She was leaving Bae alone at home to go to the tavern and have fun with the pirates. However, how Milah retorted to that? "Run home, Rumple. It’s what you’re good at." That's a public shaming and humiliation.
 * "Signed away her reproductive rights"? Again, no. He signed away his potential second child. Not her. Oh, and again, you all seem really good at ignoring the real reason behind this act: SAVE BAE'S LIFE. So, what Rumple was supposed to do? Surely, you seem to think it would have been better if he let Bae died. Or, murdering Fendrake? As it was Milah's solution. What a great alternative. Let's not fall into the "in the society they lived in" excuse. Please. Like it gives a free pass to all abuse or anything. Plus, she seemed in love with Hook. She could have had a child with Hook. Not like it would have bother anyone.
 * "led to her being mocked"? I dare you to find any clear dialogue, stating that Milah was mocked. There is nothing in all of her episodes stating that she was mocked or shamed herself directly. Heck, she even went to the tavern and no one annoyed her. She was having quite some fun actually, and people had fun with her. From what we saw & know, people had pity for her more than anything, they cared about her and her well-being. The Village Woman cared enough to go tell Rumple that she was being kidnapped. All Milah cared about was her reputation in the village; nothing more. She did say it: "Other wives became honoured widows". She would have prefered to see her husband dead, and being honored. That's how horrible she is. She was not even mocked herself, her problem was the reputation of her husband. She was blaming Rumple's for her lack of reputation cos he was alive, she was not even trying to get herself that reputation she wanted that much.

So yeah, please don't go that you're being objective on this one, cos you really don't seem to. But yeah, it tends to be one of the focus of people who hates Rumple: victim blaming him with Milah. You're not the only one.

I'm getting tired of this. So I'll just say this and be done. I am trying to be objective, I think both Rumple and Milah are to blame for the situation. Rumple may not have directly abused her, but his decisions led to a toxic environment to which she, I admit, contributed. I don't think the situation is one sided like you seem too. I may come off as biased against Rumple to you, but that's because I don't like him and you appear to. I also don't hate Milah like most of the fandom does.