Board Thread:Spoilers!/@comment-24810267-20150427050334/@comment-26255666-20150501041204

Eskaver wrote: BallerinaBelle wrote: Zelena would not be a good mother because the 1st rule of being a good parent is having a child when both parents are ready. If that doesn't happen then the child is already not being put first therefore the parent is not suitable. Having a child out of revenge/manipulation is Evil Parent 101. At the very least it is against the child's well-being and against the other parent's well-being. Um.... you can have a good parent if they weren't ready and are single. It isn't the best situation, but plenty of people have parents that are single and may have not planned it out.

Just because people are doing something doesn't make it right and "popularity" or "bandwagon" should never be a legitimate or moral reason for something this serious. If you aren't ready then you aren't ready, it's not complicated. Single parents who didn't plan having their kids aren't good parents if they are bringing a child into this world without being ready for them, that's just messed up to do to your child. They didn't ask to be born, they deserve both parents, and they deserve a family. Choosing to willfully and purposefully take that away from your child is really an atrocity to them. Now yes, some people despite their self centeredness then try to turn it around and make the best of the situation but they already failed at giving their child their best shot. I was raised by a single parent who was raised by a single parent, I have many single parents in my family and I knew quite a few of kids growing up with single parents. None of those kids, myself included, prefer living with just 1 parent and half the help, half the love, half the support, etc. The fact of the matter is, more single parents are bad parents than good parents and they usually tend to put themselves first not only in the moment of conception/birth but they usually do that their whole lives and don't put the child front and center the way a child should be. Look up any statistic and it backs up that children raised in single parent homes are statistically far more likely to end up also a single parent/divorced, a high school dropout, in jail, in rehab/drug problems, and even killed. No one is saying this happens to all kids in this situation, I'm certainly an exception, but it is more likely than kids with both parents. This isn't my personal opinion, it's what math proves. (When children are born with out their parents because of a death etc. everyone agrees it's unfortunate because they are growing up with out their parents... Therefore why would any parent actually choose this kind of situation for their child from the get-go?)

But regardless, having a child out of revenge/manipulation is about the absolute worst reason in the world to have a child. Children learn how to love, trust, communicate, etc. from their parents. When a parent only had you to use you then how will you ever learn anything but manipulation? You'll either most likely never know true love and you'll always be an easy target because you'll be missing that love from a parent (a void) that you never got when you were younger, or you'll never trust anyone and always be overly suspicious of everyone around you. Neither way is a comfortable way to live. Revenge is not a situation anyone wants to be born into. Imagine when they grow older, "Where's Dad?" "That old fool? I was just using him to get back at your Aunt. Who cares where he is." "But he's my dad?" "No he's not, he's just a donor." If you don't say that then you have to lie to the kid until they grow up, find out the truth, and then they get like Emma because you lied to them their whole lives.